I’ve been asked to speak about the Sedona Method and how it affects breaking family relationships, breaking ties, breaking unhealthy relationships with family.
So I’d like you to just think about, for a moment, some relationship that you have in your life with a family member that is either unhealthy for you or you’re trying to step away from, in some way, that you’re not wanting, you don’t want to step closer, you want to step away from it.
And could you open to that experience of that member of the family? It could be friendship, not just the family, but someone who’s important in your past and in your life, has been important.
Could you just open to that person? Picture them, stories that go with them, and the emotions. What emotion comes up when you think about that person?
And could you welcome that person, welcome that emotion? Just open to it. (I am going to sneeze in a second) just open to the emotion and open to a little bit more. And could that emotion be released? Is it possible to let it go? Would you? Are you willing to let go of that emotion? And when (an invitation to do it now) ?
And think about that person again or a different person, but that person, if they’re still in your present awareness. And again, what emotion comes up? Underneath the stories, the pictures, the sound and sensation, what’s the emotion? And could you open to that emotion? And would you open that emotion? And when?
Again. Think about that person. And the emotion that’s underneath it, behind it, through it. And could you open to that emotion? Would you open to that emotion? And when?
And just notice, do you feel any different than when you started? When you think about that person, does it feel lighter, less dense, has it changed? Just notice that in the three releases that something has shifted. Don’t worry about what or how, but just if something shifted.
So I would keep doing that on that person or that situation, keep releasing until it’s quiet. And what usually happens is sometimes before it gets quiet, it shifts into another person or another situation. And again open to it.
Another thing you can do is open to the person and then open to the emotion. And then the second question is, is there anything you want to do anything about it, something you want to say to the person, something you want to do to the person, something that comes up. What is it you want to do about it? Fix it? change it? Just open to whatever comes up that you want to do about it.
And then the third question, is there any sense that this person, this emotion, this situation is personal? Has to do with you or who you are? Because if it didn’t feel like it was related to you, it wouldn’t be important. And the degree to which we identify with it, the degree which we hold on to it as ours is the degree to which it causes real suffering.
So could you just open to how much it feels like it’s yours, has to do with you? And these three questions are all ways of asking to open to it because it doesn’t matter if you release it or are open to it. Either way, it moves.
So those are two things you can do to work through people in your family. And if they’re your family members, it may take you quite a few sessions of letting go or it may not take you as many as you might think.
The third thing I think of is the belief systems that lock it in. You know, my sister’s supposed to be a certain way. She’s not that way. My mother was supposed to have done something. My father was this. My husband was that. My ex-husband was that. All the belief systems that lock in, that we hold against or measure those people in our lives up to.
allI realized that when I was married, my husband was supposed to be my lover, the father of my children, my partner, and my business partner – everything. He was supposed to walk on water in his spare time. And I was angry at him for not doing all that. And I never, as a feminist, thought I would ever expect that of him, but it was in me.
So I got to do a lot of releasing about what a husband was and releasing those belief systems, opening to them and becoming aware of them. And as you release one, you become aware of the others so you don’t have to know all of them. You don’t have to have a list. You can just start working on letting go of the emotions.
So all of this may feel like a lot of work and it really isn’t. It isn’t really releasing that. It’s not really work because what it really is is letting go of what’s holding you. Just even the awareness of wow!! One of the reasons we think we want to understand things is because of the wow! we get as something releases. And it isn’t really the understanding, it’s in the sense of self-exploration that sees the energy field called a belief system and realizes it’s ridiculous and lets it go.
Those don’t have to come through deep therapy. They can. They don’t have to come through deep therapy or lots of cleaning the cellar. They can just come up spontaneously because they want to be released because they’re keeping you from being free.
So when you are feeling stuck in a relationship, an old relationship, open to the possibility of opening to it and releasing that which binds you to it which is the emotions, the belief systems and the sense that it’s yours and has to be a certain way because it is yours.
So a joy releasing and embracing and opening. Have a good day. Thank you.