There are different levels of human physical form and energy just as there are cells and then there are atoms.
Quantum physics has backed up the spiritual belief that we are ultimately all one that we don’t just exist as separate beings. Since for most of us the concept of oneness is not where we usually live, I am going to focus for now on some guidelines for healthy functioning in the “real” world and notice along the way the possibility of other possible levels. Grounding and creating space mentioned earlier are based on separateness, both in their physically dense and energetic forms. By “energetic”, I mean the movement of less dense energies in ways not usually perceivable by humans. In some traditions, these subtle energies are also referred to as spiritual energies.
Having good physical and energetic boundaries is also crucial to good health.
You need to know where you end and where the world including others begins. For many, childhood was the antithesis of creating a sense of ”self “ as well meaning family members invaded and tried to control or else left us abandoned. In response to being smothered, traumatized, or ignored, some people build walls, some become hyper alert, some search for something to fill the hole, and some do all of the above. None of which works very well as what we need is a semipermeable membrane that lets in what feeds us and keeps out what is harmful or toxic. This membrane needs to function on all levels: physical, emotional, mental, and energetic.
There is a spectrum of boundaries.
One extreme is the person who has “no” boundaries and lets everyone and everything indiscriminately into their field, turning over control of their lives to others. Those folk are usually totally dysfunctional. However all of us have places where we cede our self to others in less extreme ways. “Others” are not only other humans, but can be ideas, organizations, bacteria, and anything else that is not intrinsically of us. The other extreme is the person who has such thick walls that they are unable to let very much information in, let alone another person. We have all “been there done that too.” Everyone has moments of poor boundaries and thick walls, especially when re-stimulated from earlier trauma.
Boundary work is great for one’s awareness and health.
When I work with someone on boundaries, I start by having them face away from me or close their eyes as I walk toward them from all sides. I ask them to notice when they are aware of me and how each side differs. Next I slowly move my hand near their body front and back at their level of awareness. We talk about what they learned. Then we work with grounding to see how that changes their experience. We add thoughts from highly emotional experiences to see what that does. We add movement and a different location. By increasing our awareness, we begin to naturally fill in the holes and rebuild our semi-permeable membrane. This leads to exploring more subtle aspects such as what lives in our actual gut and “gut feelings” about a situation or person.
By definition, you can’t have boundaries where there is no energy or consciousness.
Any place there has been trauma, especially repeated trauma where there is “no one home”, there is an open door/hole. Closing those doors and creating coherent physical, emotional, mental, and energetic energy fields is a lifetime project. Creating a generally viable boundary is not that difficult. By becoming aware, grounding, learning how to run energy, and having some degree of protection, we can start building it today.